Man I remember so much shit. Just flashes back to me sometimes. I wish I was like eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. Like erase my memory man. Then I wouldn’t remember sgit like her bday and the hotel room an how she told me it was the best birthday she’d ever had. Wow memories like that just don’t go away. One of the best nights and feelings ever. Fml.
I think of all the things I’ve ever had in my life…
And the thing I miss the most is having kids. Yes I realize they were not my biological kids and that I only got to be with them a short time. But, there was something so great and awesome about being with them and loving them. Hanging out, driving around going places with them, the joy they gave me….so many other things. Things turned out horribly and I lost them in my life. I still think about them, love them and wish I could spend time with them. I know that’s not going to happen and prob wouldn’t be healthy for me or them, but I miss them. I remember laughing and playing and the joy they gave me and it makes me hurt….even though it makes me hurt, I am thankful for the memories and the time I got to spend with them. I wouldn’t change that part for all the money in the world. Maybe someday I will have a chance to have kids again…I hope so, I liked being a mom.
Not gonna lie, I’m having a rough time lately. In a lot of ways. Feeling run down and frustrated. I thought I had rid myself of negativity. Still trying to shake it…..I can do this!
About me
Some people are cold hearted bitches. Some people are not. Most people will get what they deserve in the end.Most of my shit is borrowed. I'll let you know if its not.
